Review: Well of Horniness (Reasonable Facsimile Theatre)

  
  

Despite strong cast, feral lesbian romp jilted by clunky pacing

  
  

The Well of Horniness - A Reasonable Facsimile

  
A Reasonable Facsimile Theatre Company presents
  
The Well of Horniness
  
Written by Holly Hughes
Directed by Samantha Garcia
at The Cornservatory, 4210 N. Lincoln (map)
through April 30  |  tickets: $15  |  more info

Reviewed by Paige Listerud

Who doesn’t love lesbians on the loose? Well, maybe Peter LaBarbera—but, then, he looks like he hasn’t got laid in, like, forever. The rest of us would eagerly plunge headfirst into a production promising slap-dash Sapphic pleasure. Trouble is, Holly Hughes’ 1983 schlock comedy The Well of Horniness comes across more like a wet, sloppy kiss from your lesbian aunt than a well-placed riff on dangerous, dueling dykes and the bisexual gals who can’t forget them. Not that the cast of A Reasonable Facsimile Theatre Company doesn’t give it the good, old (*ahem*) college try. But Samantha Garcia’s direction spreads out action, and not in a good way, across the Conservatory’s stage, often losing valuable focus and timing.

“These muffdivers have been looking for a rumble,” quotes detective Garnet McClit (Miquela Cruz) and that, at least, is one thing to be grateful for concerning individual performances. As Georgette, Karen Shimmin throws seductive glances over her shoulder like it was meant for you, and does feral, raccoon-raised lesbian with perfection. Angela DeMarco, as the redhead (rather, red-wigged) Babs, brings strong, pistol-packin’ bravado to the stage. Liz Hoffman’s absolutely scores with her daffy depiction of Vicki, who once belonged to the lesbian sorority, Tri Delta Tribads, but now faces married, middle class boredom with her carpet-clearance husband Rod, played with hearty, sympathetic charm by Susan Gaspar. Of the ladies, only Cruz needs to add a little seductive spice to her butch to raise the heat of night.

Tragically, even for schlock theater, the part of the Narrator (Emily Friedrick) is drastically overwrought. Hughes’ comedy is no police procedural or noir thriller, yet a little more attention to the dry style of those two genres might generate more laughs than Friedrick’s current delivery. As is, she comes across more like a town barker hawking her wares than a master of Hughes’ overwrought and over-punned exposition. Of course, a large part of the problem may be Hughes’ writing. It’s showing its age–and its fish jokes do have a limited shelf life. Clearly, schlock is a comic actor’s medium—you have to know when hold back and when shoot for the stars—sometimes without too much help from the script.

(L-R, back row) Karen Shimmin, Miquela Cruz, Susan Gaspar; (front row) Emily Friedrick, Liz Hoffman, Angela DeMarco - the cast of 'The Well of Horniness'

Most of all, the biggest crime seems to be those moments when the ladies play it safe. Police pat downs, prison scenes—these are the things that dreams are made of. They’re already salacious, by their very nature and pornographic history–now how to make them outrageous, transcending their formulaic predictability? That’s the formula that Garcia and cast have yet to work out. Much as I love Hoffman upping the silliness quotient for the show or DeMarco channeling Joan Crawford, The Well of Horniness still clunks along too disjointedly for a truly rad ladies’ night out. Let’s hope they can tighten things up in the course of the run. Do it for the sisters who are doin’ it for themselves!

  
  
Rating: ★★½
  
  

The Well of Horniness continues through April 30th, with performances Fridays and Saturdays at 8pm, at The Cornservatory Theater, 4210 N. Lincoln Ave. Tickets are $12-$15. Make reservations online at www.arftco.com, or call 773-418-4475. Group rates are available. This show is for adults only.

 

Artists

Cast

Miquela Cruz*, Emily Friedrick, Susan Gaspar*, Liz Hoffman* Karen Shimmin* and Angela DeMarco*.

Production

The show is directed by Samantha Garcia*, set and costumes designed by Tina Haglund*, props designed by Susan Gaspar*, stage-managed by Hazel Marie*,
marketing by Steve Hickson*.

*A Reasonable Facsimile Theatre ensemble member.

     
     

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